Home Again

My holiday to Australia is over! I had the best three weeks of my life. The journey itself was gruelling, almost 3 hours by train then 21 hours by plane is not for the faint hearted but it was worth it. The  time spent with my brother and his family and my aunt Lana was wonderful. The country is amazing, vast and hot and full of flies but so amazing. I saw kangaroos, koalas, wombats, sand dunes higher than a house, parks larger than a town and spaces wider and more open than anything I could contemplate. Perth is a hot and dry place with mainly sandy areas but it is also a beautiful place. The jacaranda trees are especially beautiful and the flowers are colourful and mainly familiar, like geraniums, petunias, begonias and roses which all flower year round because of the climate. But the most wonderful thing about the country is the family I met there. I grew to love my brothers children and my aunts grandchildren very quickly. I met friends I hadn't seen in over thirty years and chewed over some memories of my teenage years with them. I went on a dinner cruise down the Swan River, 4 wheel driving over sand dunes, pic-nicking in the park, driving through the bush and mall shopping. I made memories I will treasure for ever and had experiences that I will never forget but that time spent with my family cannot be measured. It was precious and wonderful and all those other adjectives and I can't put a price on it. That's why when I had to leave, I cried like a baby! It was so hard to leave them all behind, knowing  I wouldn't see them again. That's the tyranny of distance, as my brother said to me, and it gave a bittersweet ending to whole trip because as much as I wanted to go home to my English family I also didn't want to leave my Australian family. So would I do it again? In a heartbeat!

Latest Makes

Here are my two latest projects, A Hello Kitty lookalike for Ellady (Lacey has one too with purple trim but didn't get to photograph it) and a topsy turvy Cinderella doll for Lacey.

It's getting really close to me going to Australia now. I'm excited about the trip but I'm nervous too! It's the first time in my life that I've ever been travelling alone. I have always had some form of companionship, be it family or friend so this is new to me. I'm using the train to get to the airport so will be going alone all the way. It's going to be quite the experience. I've loaded my tablet and phone with books, bought puzzle books and put as much music on my ipod as I can so I'll have enough to occupy myself on my journey. I have everything done regarding tickets, passport and visa so I'm really well organised but I'm still worried that something will go wrong. I'm imagining myself missing connecting flights because I get lost, losing luggage, forgetting documents etc etc etc. I don't do this when I'm travelling with others, in fact I'm the one who deals with everything from packing to boarding the plane. I'm the one who rallies the troops and keeps everything running smoothly so why am I being such a wimp over this! I just need to give myself a good talking to, I think.

Cute Bag with a surprise inside

I've just finished crocheting this for Lacey. It's a drawstring bag and when you turn it inside out it's a dollie's cradle. I think it's so cute and I did enjoy making it. I saw it on Youtube and had to have a go. I'm going to make one for my niece, Sophie, next. She loves Hello Kitty, so I'm going to put the face on the bag and make a little Kitty to go inside with a Hello Kitty blanket. I wish I was young again so I could have one, LOL.

Lacey's Backpack

This is the Hello Kitty backpack I crocheted for Lacey. Don't know what I'm going to work on next. I might look at doing some pieces to sell on Etsy and see how that goes. I was going to start with some small things like fingerless gloves and socks as they seem to sell well. Maybe a few baby things as well. What ever I decide I need to get on with it. I like having something to work on, especially at night time when watching tv.

He Is Risen

If you have read any of the old posts on here you'll know that I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints (Mormon). I take my religion seriously and so today, Easter Sunday, is a time for me to really reflect on my Saviour and the sacrifice He made for me. I understand the doctrine of Atonement but I never really thought about how it pertained to me. For many years I just accepted it as part of my beliefs and never really explored it in any detail. Then I dropped away from my religion, started living a life that wasn't in keeping with the gospel of Christ. I enjoyed that life for many years but then I was pulled up by the bootstraps and made to see the error of my ways and that was when I really got to know about the power of the Atonement.
All the wrong things I'd done, all the bad decisions I'd made could be forgiven, could be forgotten if I was prepared to repent and follow the teachings of my Lord and Saviour. Repentance is an ongoing blessing for all of us. It is the chance to say sorry, to right our wrongs, to make restitution for our sin and benefits us by opening the road back to Heaven. This is such a blessing to know that I have a path to follow that will lead me back to my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.
Some may say that God and Heaven don't exist but I know they do and I also know that the purpose of this life is to prove ourselves worthy to live with Him in the next life. And that is the point of the Atonement, without it we would never get that chance, our life on earth would be totally worthless. Because of the sacrifice of a perfect man who suffered and bled and died for me I get to have a life full of beauty and joy and if I just do the things He has asked I get to carry that on for eternity.
Not much to ask is it?

A few photos

These are my flowers from Craig, for Mother's Day.

Roses are my favourite flower!

This is the hair bow that I knitted for Lacey and Ellady. Lacy wanted a pink, Minnie Mouse bow so I found a pattern for the bow and sewed black circles on. I croched it onto a hair elastic and voila. And if you do it for Lacey, you have to do it for Ellady so had to make two.

The swans on the waterfront in Lincoln. We had a lovely trip out for our dinner. Sat on the waterfront watching the swans while we ate then had a wander round for an hour. We couldn't get over how warm and sunny it was for the end of March.

I loved this spiral staircase stuck on the side of a building, coming from nowhere and going nowhere.

Couldn't believe it when these traveller's stepped out of the stretch limo. Proof that they dress like this in real life, away from the cameras of Big Fat Gypsy Weddings.

I'm Back!!!!

I haven't posted for a couple years because , well just because. Lots of things have happened including another grandchild, Ellady Paige, born on Sept 30th 2009 and me turning fifty. I've taken a photography course and started my knitting again so I'm going to use my blog as a place to post my photos of my creations and other subjects. I might write the odd post as well, ha ha!
Anyway, since this is the eve of Mother's Day I thought I'd write about my kids and how I feel about being a mum. I always wanted to be a mum, I never had any ambition to be a teacher, nurse, whatever, I only ever wanted to get married and have kids. Thankfully I achieved that, four times. Each pregnancy was different as was each birth but one thing they all had in common was the rush of all consuming love that I felt when I looked upon the face of the baby I held in my arms. From the moment they were born, I loved each one in such an intense way that I knew my heart would always belong to them. And it has.
Motherhood isn't an easy journey. It is filled with pot holes, twists in the road, mountains to climb and canyons to cross but is the greatest adventure a woman can ever take. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's unrewarding, sometimes it's downright frustrating and your purse will always be empty but when your child smiles at you, hugs you, kisses you and tells you he loves you, it hits home that all the hard work is worth it for the reward that money cannot buy, a heart full of love.
I have loved my own adventure and continue to do so even though they are now grown and don't need me as much. I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I probably would have been richer in monetary terms but I'd rather have an empty purse than an empty heart.

Don't want to say Goodbye

My favourite aunty goes home on Saturday. Lana will be flying back to Australia and I am really going to miss her. I know she's in a quandry because as much as she wants to go home to her family she doesn't want to leave her English family. It will be hard for all of us to say goodbye.
Lana is very special to us because she lived with us when we were children and was like a big sister. She had a big influence on our lives for many years and we loved her dearly.
She taught me how to put my makeup on properly, how to dress with style and told me never to refuse to dance with a boy because it took a lot of courage for them to ask. That piece of advice meant I always had a partner for the last dance at school when many of my friends had to sit it out!
When Lana left to go to Australia, thirty two years ago, it was like losing a limb. She was a confidante, a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh with, to tell secrets to and the best friend I'd ever had. Then came the wonderful invention of email and we could keep in touch regularly again. But nothing compares with the opportunity to meet her again. I've realised she is still that funny, big sister, best friend, beloved aunty she has always been in my memory, that the years may have changed her in some ways but in all those important things she is still the same.
I will miss her all over again but I wouldn't have given up this chance to get to know her again for all the tea in China. We love you Lana, God speed till we meet again!

Here Comes the Snow!

We've had some snow! We haven't had snow this often for a long time. Apparently, it's the coldest winter since 1992. All I know is it's COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD. I hate snow, I really hate it. I hate driving in it, I hate walking in it BUT I love to look at it, from behind the window in my warm, cosy house. There's nothing quite as pretty as a winter snow scene before anybody's walked on it. I've always wished I could paint because I've always wanted to have a painting of a snow scene. Anybody out there who can donate one? No? I'll have to be satisfied with my amateur photo's then, I suppose.

Another Year

Well. we're into another year again. It's true what they say about how the years pass quicker as you grow older. I can't think where this last year has gone.

Anyway we had a great christmas. Jim and the kids stayed with us for four weeks. It was so nice to have them here and get to know some of my brother's kids, who were really great. Jamie loved them being with us. Our aunty Lana came over with them. She is mum's youngest sister and has been in Australia over thirty years now. She is still here, staying with mum until March 5th. Having her here is such a treat for us. We love her so much. She was like a sister to us kids when we were growing up and we miss her a lot.

Mum and dad celebrated their Golden Wedding on 27th December. We had a party, a really fantastic family occasion. Most of the family attended and we had a proper knees up.

The Douglas/Mcgovern clan

Mum and Dad, cutting their cake

John had his eye operated on but had to go all the way to Cambridge to get it done. He's still got a long way to go with healing. He still can't open his eye and any light shining in it causes him pain. His healing process will be long but at least he is healing.

He can see blurry images which is a good thing so he may just get some sight back.

Hopefully this year will pass without any mishaps!

So Much for Christmas Spirit!

My husband was attacked on Friday night by two cowardly b**&^%ds. They didn't want his money or his mobile phone they just wanted to beat a defenseless man. They kicked and punched him in the face. Why does that give them a buzz? What is in their heads as they are doing it? Would they get the same buzz if faced with somebody bigger than themselves, I think not. The scum that commit these crimes are cowards and if faced alone by somebody bigger would run a mile.
They split his eyeball open and he has had to have it stitched back together. His lens has fallen behind his eye and he may have damage to his retina. Which means one more op to reattach his lens and probably another to repair damage to the retina. He will lose some sight, maybe all, in that eye and is going to be at least six weeks before it is healed. He can't return to work until it is fully healed so it will be the new year before he does.
The police meanwhile can't do anything because there were no witnesses, no cctv and the scum had gone by the time the police got there. So scum of the earth get away scot free while we suffer the consequences.
I hope one day they get theirs and though I won't be around to see it, I'll be praying that they do.

It's nearly Here!!!!

It's nearly here again. I can't believe I'm writing a post about Christmas again.
I love Christmas, I know I've said that before but I do! They say that as you get older you lose the spirit and it's only for children but I disagree. I still get goosebumps when I hear a choir singing Christmas Carols and I love putting my decorations up. I love choosing and wrapping presents and I love the giving and receiving of them.

Does this mean I've never grown up? Maybe. Do I care? NO!

This year will be extra special because I have my lovely, big brother staying with three of his thirteen (YES, 13, no he's not Catholic, he's a mormon!) kids from Australia. They are over for my parent's Golden Wedding anniversary on the 27th December. It will be wonderful having a full house again for Christmas. So bring it on, cos I'm ready!!!!

I'm Menopausal!

Well, I have finally reached that milestone every woman dreads, the menopause. I have been peri-menopausal for about three years which is the beginning apparently. I haven't been to the doctors or anything, I just figured it out. My periods have been awry for years and then they started getting less frequent. I've gone a full year without one now so I guess that makes me officially a member of the club. Although, I haven't really suffered major symptoms. I do have the odd hot flush, usually in bed when I throw off all the covers, annoying hubby somewhat, then wake up shivering and hike the covers all onto my side, upsetting him again! I have suffered a few mood swings, but hubby insists that they are normal and nothing to do with the menopause. I've also been a little forgetful lately, you know walking into a room and forgetting what you came for, and I am tired a lot too.
Reading that back, I see I have all the symptoms really! So there we have it, I'm officially middle aged. Am I bothered?
Not on your life! I love not having periods every month. They were the bane of my life. No more horrible cramps, no more PMS. I love it.
I've seen some women hating every minute of it, but not me! Here's to old age and all it's freedom!

Another Year Older

It was my birthday on the first of the month. I'm now just two years away from my half century! Of course I don't feel like I'm forty eight, I only feel eighteen! Not that I care about my age, I've never been worried about getting older. There are far better things to worry about than that!
I must say that I'm enjoying my life right now. I think that maturity wins over youth any day. The wisdom that comes with age can't be bought and I wouldn't trade it in for another bash at being young again. I wouldn't want to go back to those angst filled teenage years, hair pulling young mother years, screaming, yelling mother of teens years. I've done my time, earned my reward and now I'm allowed to take a back seat and watch my own kids go through it!

Trip to the Dentist

I've just been to have my tooth out at the emergency dentist. Actually I went last Sunday but the dentist wouldn't take it out as I had an infected tooth. He sent me off with a prescription for antibiotics and told me to come back in a week. So, there I was all psyched up and ready and had to go home and wait another week for the dreaded deed!
Can I just say here, I am terrified of dentists. I hate them so much I only go when I'm in so much pain I need to die!
Back I went today. With everybody telling me, it doesn't hurt, you won't feel a thing, I sauntered into the room feeling calm and relaxed - actually, I was bricking it but I'm a grown woman who has had babies and should be able to stand any pain thrown at me so was only acting all calm and relaxed. I managed the injection without crying but when he went in to pull the tooth, pain, pain, pain! So he gave me another injection and waited a few minutes then went in again. At first, no pain, just pressure, okay so far. Then as he started to tug, pain, yes I felt pain! I jumped and squealed and he just kept pulling that tooth right out. It came out in about 30 seconds but boy were they long seconds. Afterwards, he apologised and explained that I still had a slight infection left in the tooth, that's why it hurt, but he felt it was better to pull the tooth than give another round of medication. Well, that's all right then!!!
So people, for the record, it did hurt, I did feel something and I'm never going to the dentist again!

Bright New Shiny Car!

I've bought a new car. Well, not new exactly, it's two years old. It's a red Seat Ibiza and it's beautiful. As soon as I saw it, it shouted, 'buy me'. Hubby said, 'You can't buy a car just because you like the colour!' but he doesn't understand the pyschology of it. Red is not only my favourite colour, it's my lucky colour. And that car is just so lovely. It cost more than I really wanted to pay but hey, it's red and it's only two years old, only has 17000 on the clock and it's red.
I pick it up on Wednesday afternoon and I can't wait. Not that I haven't enjoyed driving my Renault Clio, it's been a great car but it's seven years old now and I felt I had to get rid of it while I could still get a reasonable trade in. I managed to get £1100 which wasn't bad considering it's age.
So, roll on Wednesday and the chance to drive my shiny, red (did I mention it's red), Seat Ibiza. Oh, and the thing that really sold me on it was the cup holder that comes out from the dash!

Back to School

Jamie went back to school this week. Or rather, he went to college. My baby is college boy! I really don't know where the time has gone. It seems like only yesterday I was a mother of four young boys struggling with all the trials family life brings and now I'm a grandmother with all my boys grown and flown away. Jamie is growing up and although he will always be with us, he is no longer as needy as he was.
I feel like my role as a mother has depleted, somehow. I do enjoy having the house to ourselves but I do also miss the chaos, a little. I understand the empty nest syndrome now. It's the feeling that you're not needed any more, that you're obselete, surplus to requirements.
But then my grandchildren come running in, shouting for grandma, and my heart fills up again. I realise that you never stop being needed because the next generation always fills the gap. My grandchildren give me wings again. I may not be able to fly as high or as fast but there is still some mileage left in me.

Grow Your Own

Gosh, it's ages since I've written anything. So here's a quick catch up on what's happening at chez Beech.
Hubby and I had a midweek break to Rome at the end of June. Jamie went to France with his school so we jetted off too. Rome is a wonderful place and there is so much to see but I wouldn't recommend doing it in summer. Honestly, walking around in 38 degree heat with no shade and no breeze is no joke. The heat really got to me and most days I was absolutely beaten by 3 o' clock, needing to sit and chill out for a couple of hours. The siesta is such a good idea and I see now why they do it! The sights are amazing, especially St Peter's Church, so I'm pleased we went but I wouldn't go back.
Jamie had a great time in France and has now officially left school. He went to his prom, looking all grown up and enjoyed himself immensely. He is loving his time at home, so it will be a shock to his system going to college in September.
Anyway, as to the title of this little missive, I've gone all gardener. After we've had the back garden paved over I suddenly decided to grow my own veg! So I've got all sorts of buckets and pots, full of veg, on my patio. I've already had a crop of beetroot and spring onions and believe me, they are so much better when you've grown them yourself. I have red onions, green peppers, sweetcorn, carrots, peas, french beans, rhubarb, strawberries and lettuce all growing merrily. I also have tomatoes and cucumber in my green house which have been cropping nicely for three weeks now.
It isn't really about the money saving aspect, it's about the pure pleasure of seeing the green shoots coming through, then the fruits appearing. Picking and eating veg you have grown is so satifying. It gives me such a buzz making a salad from my own veg. I've been a bit haphazard this year and haven't really planned my garden properly but I'm still pleased with the results. Next year, I'll be more organised but I know it will give just as much pleasure.
I'm not about to dig up the patio though. Container gardening is a lot easier and less backbreaking than having a veg plot. And I've proved you can grow your own even without a garden!

My Baby Has Left School!

I can't believe this day has come! Jamie left school today. He had his leaver's prom last week and thoroughly enjoyed it. He has matured so much over the last few years. I can't believe how grown up he is. I still remember the tiny, vulnerable boy he was when he first started school. At the time we had no idea what he would achieve. We had no idea whether he would ever be able to talk, walk, run and play like other children.

As he grew each new milestone was a wonderful achievement for us all. The day he walked without his walker, the day he put two words together, the day he used his first Makaton sign were all special, red letter days. He worked so hard to achieve what comes naturally to others.

Since he's been at St Hugh's Special Needs Senior School he has blossomed from a little boy into a young man. His speech has got better and better and he can now say a sentence of four words that is understandable. I know he'll never have the life boys of his age should but he has still achieved more in his 16 years than some do in a lifetime.

We attended his leaver's ceremony today. Watching my boy walk up to the stage to accept his Record of Achievement brought tears to my eyes. To see him laughing with his headmaster and saying thank you to his teacher made me want to jump up and cheer.

Now he starts on a new phase in his life. He's going to college in September, for two years, on a Life and Vocational Studies course. He'll be taught independence skills. He will never achieve total independance but hopefully one day he will be able to do simple things for himself.

I know he will never live independantly from us but my special boy will continue to spread his wings and one of these days he will soar higher than any of us ever thought possible. You just wait!